Summer School Reflections

ICON

1. (My grandfather died when I was 2 years old, and it is very hard for me to remember his image. I could only see him through pictures my grandmother would show me. I would see his life throughout my imagination with the stories my grandmother would tell me. Every time my mom left me with my granny to be babysat, she would sit down and tell me history about my grandfather. She would tell me that he is very well known in Tijuana, even now after his death. He dedicated himself to helping others. She said that he owned a very large piece of land in Tijuana that is now known as La Colonia Castillo. He gave the land to people that were trying to get back on their feet instead of selling it to become a wealthy man. He had a very important vision, he wanted to be remembered for many years to come, he didn't want to die and his memory to die off along with him, he wanted to be remembered for the good deeds he did through his life and leave his mark in history. I’ve always felt the same way, I also want to leave my mark in history, and so ever since I’ve know about my grandfather, I have wanted to live the legacy he set down for me)
This is Cesar's very first paragraph. What is good about this paragraph is that it explains some details about his grandpa. It is also good because in the beginning it has something very shocking that you would not expect.

(In Boondock Saints, Joe Yakavetta, a big mob boss is on trial for the death of countless numbers of people, possession and distribution of many drugs, and other criminal activities. There is not enough evidence for him to be convicted under the court of law, so he is going to walk. The Boondock Saints come in, mid trial, and publicly execute him. One life may not be worth another, but how about one life being worth 6 or 7 people? I think that person is deserving of death. I strongly support the Boondock Saints and any other vigilante doing some good out there, and I myself might possibly become one)

This the end of Eric's paper and this is a good piece of writing because in the end he uses the loop to head back to the beginning and which that makes it a good piece. The end of this paragraph made me really think. Why because well it says that he may be one in the future.

2. Explain what aspect of yours is the most outstanding. why does this aspect stand out to you?

What is more oustanding to me is that in my paper I tryed to talk more about my dad and how he could not be able to play with Los Caneros de Zacatepec. This aspect stands out to me because in the past I have never written something like this in the past.

3. If you had one more draft or one more day to work, what would you do? Why?

If I had one more draft than I would put some more details and how I can achieve this goal. This will help me because it will allow people to read how becoming a soccer player can be really hard.



4. State the importance of the Icons project in one sentence!

You will produce a highly polished piece of reflective writing in which you describe your place in a continuum of World Icons.

BOOK REVIEW

1. Read at least two other students' Icons projects. Then, cite and explain one specific example of extremely high quality work. Link to this, copy and paste the text, show the image... whatever is necessary to show this great work. Then, explain what makes it so great.


(Throughout the history of America we have had many war heroes dating back to the pilgrims time. But what if American “war heroes” weren’t really heroes at all? What if everything we have been told is a lie? Pat Tillman is an example of a leaked “war hero” that had an elaborate twisted story around an accidental death. Where Men Win Glory is the story of this one man Pat Tillman and the controversy surrounding the war he was killed in. It touches on why he chose the army over professional football, how he was killed, and pre 9-11 build up. It also touches on a lot of controversy surrounding how the government reports deaths from friendly fire)
This sounds like a good piece of work because it talks about back then. It talk about war heroes from back then not being war heroes and how this can all be just be a lie. What makes it so good is that in the paragraph has some questions. The questions are really good and that makes the paragraph a well essay.


2. Explain what aspect of yours is the most outstanding. why does this aspect stand out to you?

In my book review I put the paragraph separately and that made the book review more better. I also put the paragraph in their sections. I explained how the bok was really good and how.

3. If you had one more draft or one more day to work, what would you do? Why?

If I had another draft than I would let some teacher check my book review draft and then the techer would tell what else I can do and what is wrong with it.
4. State the importance of the book review in one sentence!
 
The importance of this book review is that we had to read a book and than write a book review about the book in a website called goodreads. 
 
In General...


1. What did you discover about your writing during summer school?
What I discovered throughout my writing is that I had tried to give a lot of details threw it, but then again I also tried to get focused on it.
2. What goals do you have for your writing in the future?
My new goals for the future is that I will now put more hard work on my piece of writing and I will put all the parts that are needed.

Wrting Tips

1. Make Meaning Early: Make sentences start with a subject than a verb.
Ex: Marcos shot cesar in the leg.

2. Activate Your Verbs: Reveals the action of the verb.
Ex: Cesar jumped the fence to pass theball to Jared.

3. Take It Easy On Those -ing's:
Good Def: Prefers the simple present or past tense.
Bad Def: Changes the sound, May sound repetitive, Makes the words longer.
Ex: During Anna's Vacation in San Diego, last weekend, she ran swam, and went to rollerskate.

4. Watch Those Adverbs: Use to change the meaning of a verb.
Ex: Cesar crashed drunkenly into his couch.

5. The Loop!: Creates an expirience for someone else.
Example of good loop.  http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/01/books/review/Verghese-t.html?_r=1&src=me&ref=books

6. Concerts, Not Pancakes!:
Concerts Def: May Startout  good, but may end up better.
Pancakes Def: May strat good, but will end up really boring.

Ex: We are what we search for.
The word for is added to the end of the sentence.

Ex: We are what we search.
The word for is not in the sentence and it makes the sentence much better.

Icon Final Draft

Jared Morales

8/12/10

A Father's Dream

It was July 27, 2004. A sunny day in Crosby Park and my dad Alejandro yelled "shoot son shoot!" from the goalie area, where he was watching intently. He once told me that he wants me to fulfill his dreams of becoming a professional soccer player. He wants me to play because he didn't have the chance to become a professional soccer player. He planned to play for a team in Mexico that was called Los Caneros De Zacatepec, but he didn't have the money to travel to Zacatepec were he was going play. Zacatepec was a futbol power house back in 1978-1981. In 1983 the manager, Ignacio Trelles, offered my father the chance to pick his own jersey number, and my dad decided on the number 19. The manager told him that he needed money to travel to Zacatepec. I still could not believe how well my dad played when he was 19. My dad asked me if I could fulfill his dreams. I jumped and said "of course I will anything for you!",and from that day on it is my dream to become a professional soccer player for my dad.

"Soccer!" I began playing soccer in 2003 with my friend Ignacio, but I was not good enough. So instead, my father started to train me to play the same position that he played, defense, because he said that it one of the most important positions on the field. I listened to my dad and started playing as a defender even though I wanted to play as a forward so that I could score some goals just like my cousin Rey Rebolledo. I thought that being a defender was easy, the only thing they had to do is to kick the ball out of the goalie area, but it wasn‘t that simple to just kick the ball out of there. Being a defender is hard because the defender had to stick with the player and try to take the ball away from him. After a few days of training, I still wondered why my dad was teaching me to be a defender.

It was a cloudy but bright Wednesday and I woke up with a question in my mind. I went to my parent’s room where my dad was watching television. I sat down and I asked him “why do I have to play as a defender instead of a forward?” My dad explained to me why he wants to me play as the last man on the team. Over that half-hour, he told me that he wants me to play the same position as him because he wants me to fulfill his dreams of becoming a great professional soccer player. My dad felt sad because he wanted to have played so we could have a good life. I told him that we did have a good life and that without him, we wouldn’t be happy that I wouldn’t be happy and without your training and all his hard effort. He said that I must fulfill his dreams because he didn't have the chance to be one and that is why he wants me to play in that position.

I asked him why he didn't have the chance to play in the Mexican league. He told me that he could not play because he did not have the money to travel to Zacatepec to play with the team called Los Caneros de Zacatepec. My dad said that in the past it was harder to get money then today. He had to work two jobs to get 200 pesos only. The manager offered him any place on the team, and have his own choice of jersey, but he needed about 12,000 pesos to travel to Zacatepec and to get his uniform, he had to get the money by the next week Monday. My dad told me that without money or education then you cannot achieve in your goal. I started thinking about what my dad told me about education and money to travel. For me, my dad is a hero because he taught me everything that he knows and he wants me to be better than him. When I get older I will pass my skills to the next generation and make them a better defender than my dad and me. Maybe they will play in Chelsea F.C., Barcelona F.C., maybe AC Milan and possibly take Mexico to the Word Cup Finals.

It was a nice Saturday. It was about to be 9:37am I woke up to go and play soccer with my team called Union Guerrero. By 10:05am, I was ready to go and my dad took me to the 45th park. The game had just begun. As I went in a teammate passed me the ball and, just then, I heard “shoot son, shoot!”

Icon Draft

It was 2004, July 27. A sunny day in the park called Crosby and my dad told me to "shoot son shoot". He was behind the goalie area. He once told that he wants me to be fulfill his dreams in becoming a professional soccer player. He wants me to play becuase he didn't have the chance of playing of becoming a professional soccer player. He was gonna play in a team in Mexico that was called Los Caneros De Zacatepec, but he didn't have the money to travel to Zacatepec were he was gonna play there. That team was really good back then. The manager offered him to pick his own jersey number, and he decided on the number 19. I still could not believe how good my dad was back then. It is my dream to become a professional soccer.


"Soccer!" I began playing that sport, but I sucked. So instead my dad Alejandro started training me to play the same position as him. The position that he played was defense. My dad told me to play in the same position as him because he said that it one of the most important positions that you can be in. I listened to my dad and so started playing as a defender even though I wanted to play as a forward so I can score some goals just like my cousin Rey Rebolledo. I thought that being a defender was easy to just play and kick the ball out of the goalie area, but no it wasn't simple to just kick the ball out of the area and give it to your teammate. It was hard because the defender had to stay with the player and try to take the ball away from them. After a few days that have pasted I wanted to figure out why my dad wanted me to play as the most important thing in the list the defender.


It was a cloudy but bright Wednesday and I had just woken up. I went to my parents room and my dad was watching television. My dad didn't go to work because he had the day of. I sat down and I told him that why do I have to play as a defender instead as a forward. My dad explained to me why he wants to me play as the last man in the team. We spent about 30 minutes about this discussion of me playing as a defender. He told me that he wants me to play the same position as him because he wants me to fulfill his dreams in becoming a great professional soccer player. I wondered what my dads dream was. I told him what was your dream. He told that I must fulfill his dreams in becoming a professional soccer player because he didn't have the chance to be one and that is why he wants me to play in that position.


I told him why he didn't have the chance to play in the Mexican league. He told me that he could not play because he did not have the money to travel to Zacatepec to play with the team called Los Caneros de Zacatepec. My dad said that in the past it was harder to get money then today. He told me that he had to work two jobs in one week just to get about 200 pesos. He said that the manager offered him any number that he wanted so he chose the number 19, but he told him that he needed about 12,000 pesos to travel to zacatepec and to get his uniform. He told me that he had to get the money by the next week Monday. My got another job just to get 12,000 pesos and begin his journey, but getting another job was not enough to get 12,000 pesos to begin his journey. My dad told me that without money or education then you cannot achieve in your goal/my goal. I started thinking about what my dad had told about education and money to travel. I was thinking this for three days on how to try focused on my grades. 


It was a nice Saturday. It was about to be 9:37 I woke up to go and play soccer with my team called Union Guerrero. I got ready for the game at 10:05. My dad took me to the park that they call 45th park. It was already 10:05 and the game had just began. I went in and a member gave the ball to me and I just heard "shoot son shoot!"

Icon part 4

1. I have revised my artist statement really good becuase I didn't have any settings in it. I have put a setting in my artist statementand I have put my setting more clear to the reader. I need to put a setting becuase many people might think that I could be around the world or maybe they might not even know where I am. I used concerts not pancakes on some of my sentences.

2. A sunny day in a a park called Crosby and my dad told me "Shoot son shoot." This saying that my story will be about soccer."He once told me that he wants me to fulfill my dreams in becoming a professional soccer player." That is a sentence about me fulfilling my dads dream and that is part of my story. "He didn't have the money to travel to Zacatepec to play." Another sentence that is gonna talk about how money is needed to travel to begin achieving your goal in becoming a soccer player.

3. The way that I revised my pictures is that i have gotten the ones that make point with my story. My next steps is to put all my pictures together and make those pictures make sense with my story.

4. I have revised my resources and I found out that I dont have resources. I need to put my resources in it becuase it might be important and can be useful to me becuase the teachers might want to see were I got the information from. My next step is to put resources that I used.

Icon part 3

What is now more helpful is that I have now more information about this icon. The information that I will need will go in my paper.

It was 2004, July 27. A sunny day in the park called Crosby and my dad told me to "shoot son shoot". He was behind the goalie area. He once told that he wants me to be fulfill his dreams in becoming a professional soccer player. He wants me to play becuase he didn't have the chance of playing of becoming a professional soccer player. He was gonna play in a team in Mexico that was called Los Caneros De Zacatepec, but he didn't have the money to travel to Zacatepec were he was gonna play there. That team was really good back then(that is what dad told me). They said that he can get his own number in the team and he chosed 19. I still couldn't think how good my dad was back then. I hope that I have the chance to become a professional soccer.